When a man begins his life, he is an ambitious optimist. He is brimming with enthusiasm, self-confidence, and a certain je ne sais quoi that compels him to achieve his dreams. Then… he falls in love.
society conditions a man to respect women, work hard, and be a good provider. A man bears hardships so that he can take care of his wife and children. In return, his woman will be a help to him… or so he assumes.
A man goes into the relationship with the intent of providing for his woman a good life. His aim is to give her the life that allows her to be one of the “ladies who lunch.” That is to say, he intends to provide her with the kind of lifestyle that allows her to spend her days taking care of their children, feathering the nest, taking care of herself, and so on.
He is operating under a set of unwritten rules, handed down from father to son for generations. He optimistically and naively believes that his woman will believe in him, encourage him, and push him to achieve, and to do great things in his goal of being a breadwinner and provider. Not least, when he is feeling down, he believes that she will put her arms around him, brighten his outlook and cheer him up… to say nothing of regular love and affection, which every man thinks is part of marriage.
But deeper than that, what every man desires… nay, what we are hard wired for, is to be needed. For his woman to genuinely need him, and express it is a fundamental element in what drives a man to achieve great things.
What He Actually Gets
Today’s woman has no time to “be a help to her man.” As a matter of fact, the idea that she should do so is anathema to the modern woman. “The feminist in her” is offended by the notion that she would ever need a man. Traditional gender roles are not in her life goals. She is going to be an accomplished woman.
Whereas he is stuck in an old paradigm, and thinks in terms like “We.” She is operating under a completely different set of rules. She’s got her own life, and the relationship is “Me” and “him.”
You may as well suggest that she go back in time to the Old Testament, when women were “chattel.” And if you REALLY want to see the modern American “churchian” female spit nails… bring up Proverbs 5, 1 Corinthians 7, Ephesians 5, or Titus 2.
Today’s woman “deserves more.” She expects a man that is ‘turn-key.’ A man who has already put in the hard work and sacrifice; has already slayed the dragon and achieved success.
She wants a man who is ready to lay the world at her feet before she deigns to cross the threshold of his life. She has no interest in helping him build a future. Those are his dreams, not hers. After all, she is a career woman. She has dreams to chase that do not involve “keeping her man happy.” That foolishness is for backward, unattractive women who wear ankle-length denim skirts and home school their children.
Ladies, like my Hyacinth, you [probably] did not enter the relationship with the intent of destroying your man. But that is what happens. Over the course of many years, a woman’s attempt to “get him trained,” destroys the man she fell in love with.
Once she has him trained, she can brag to her mother and her girlfriends. But it is a hollow victory. For when she gets home, she must face the mirror, knowing that the man she has now, is a man she no longer desires.
You see, once you have beaten him into malleability, and forced him into the mold of your preconceived expectations… you will find that you don’t want him anymore.
For the benefit of those who have never given it much thought, I want to simplify the process for you, so that you might understand exactly how to go about it.
Before we get started, I must warn you. This is the relationship equivalent of a nuclear bomb. When I say “destroy a man,” I am not talking about merely hurting his feelings. If you want to do that, just sleep with one of his mates.
No. I am talking about burning the very heart out of him, crushing his spirit, and grinding him to powder.
Everyone have a pencil at hand? Good! Let’s begin:
How to Destroy a Man
In Three Simple Steps
- Feign boredom when he speaks of his passions
- When your young man speaks excitedly of things that move him… ambitions, hopes, etc; you must appear disinterested. Let him know he is boring you with such talk. You have more important things with which to concern yourself.
- When your man gets onto a subject about which he is passionate… Usually something to do with how he self-identifies (his goals, his ambitions, and his dreams for the future). He is opening his heart and his life to you. He is revealing his innermost self. When someone shares themselves, he is letting down his defenses and opening the very keep of his heart to you. You must be ruthless… Crush it!
- Be dismissive – If he asks for input, your attitude should be one of “dismissive disinterest.”
- Question his plans – as though you were asking “why in the world would you want to wear that paisley tie with those polka-dotted trousers?”
- Tell him why it won’t work – If he persists in wanting to include you in his dreams, if he asks for your perspective, or input… give him all the reasons why his ambitions are unattainable.
- Never encourage him!
- If you offer encouragement of any kind, it will energize him and lift his spirits. He may start believing he can accomplish those dreams. You must not allow that!
- Any attempt on his part to try and include you in his dreams for the future, must be met with discouragement. Put your foot down and let him know that your career is too important, and keeps you too busy to be a help to him.
- When you see that you have made progress in grinding him down, he will become frustrated. Let him know, in an exasperated, yet conciliatory voice “If I only knew what you wanted, I would do it! what can I do?” Get him to write it down for you. When he does, you must then ignore his missive and studiously avoid discussion of these topics.
- Leave his written list laying exactly where he left it for you. Do not pick it up, do not look at it, do not discuss it.
- Think of this step as “turning the work” to expose any latent spots of hope or hidden potential within him so that these spots can be wiped away by your disinterest.
- Deny him your affection
A man desires sex. All the time. When women ask “Is that all you think about?” they are merely showing their ignorance of life, and the facts thereof. We men are created that way (see Proverbs chapter 5). Physical affection is the primary way in which we connect, bond, and feel close to a woman. If a man cannot have sex with his woman any time he wants, there is no point in being with her, the connection will not be there.
- Many women expect that denying affection should be the first item on the list. But that would be a mistake. If you deny him affection from the beginning, he’ll just leave you for a more willing girl who shares his optimism and zeal for life. It is important to keep him hopeful and thus, spread him thin. As time goes by, you can reduce the amount of sex you allow him.
- Begin by establishing that YOU are the one who determines when he gets any sex. Do this in the first year or so of marriage.
- Society has done the lion’s share of this conditioning for you. But leave nothing to chance in establishing primacy: let him know that something he has done in the bedroom made you “feel uncomfortable.” Tell him you were “scared.” As a last resort… if your man is particularly masculine, and you need to close a lot of ground, quickly… tell him that you felt like he “forced” you. This will shatter his world. It will shame him so completely that he won’t dare try to touch you unless you initiate, or have a welcoming, come hither attitude.
- Do not flirt. Do not return his flirtation. If he makes suggestive remarks or whispers naughty intent, just smile, or giggle. But do not engage.
- Do not initiate affection. If you must kiss him, give him a “Normal Rockwell” kiss.
- NEVER put your arms around him and tell him you love him. The only time you should hug your man is when he hugs you. You may then hug him in return. EVEN THEN… you must give him the “double tap” within five to seven seconds.
- When you are displeased with him, if he hugs you, keep your arms at your sides.
- Later… In between those rare (semi-annual-ish) occasions when you allow him sex… if he is feeling amorous (let’s face it, he’s a man, he will make the attempt), your stock replies should be similar to the following:
- “You know I love you dear, but am so not in the mood right now.”
- “Okay, but I am so tired right now, would you mind if I don’t participate while you enjoy yourself?”
- *sigh* “FINE… If it will make YOU comfortable!”
- Sleep with your back to him, and do not touch him.
- And the pièce de résistance… Become completely inert. If your man touches you in the night, you must be absolutely and completely unresponsive. Do not flinch, do not move, do not say a word. Over time, this will do the most damage to his self-respect. Regardless of how you were propagandized at university, men want willing women.
Bonus Points: When he gets depressed (and if you follow my instructions, it will happen), be angry with HIM for being depressed. It is not your fault. Never allow him to even hint that you might have a responsibility to lift him up, be an encouragement to your man, or “bear one another’s burdens.”
There you have it! Consistently perform these three steps, your man will be an empty, burnt out husk within 3-5 years. No longer will he be the masculine hard-charger of his youth. He will be a hollow man with no mojo, no focus, and no ambition. The goals he once had will still appear as a mirage in the distance. But without someone to push him, encourage him, or be part of his dreams (as he thought he was getting when he married you) he will be as a ship with the sails torn to pieces.
Rejoice in your triumph. Feminism has won.